community babies

My parents had to be in Jackson this afternoon for an appointment. Instead of studying, yet again for finals, I decided to take the night off and visit with them. We first made a pit stop into Rainbow….as we have been doing since I was about 10 years old.

Side note:  I’m sure I’ve mentioned this before but my mom used to drive over to Jackson to buy 50 pounds of organic carrots once a week when I was 14 years old because my dad had cancer and she was convinced an all-raw diet, including copious amounts of carrot juice, would cure him. My dad ended up having surgery regardless and is now cancer free (thank the good lord) but we all drank so much carrot juice, our skin turned the color of tangerines.

Anyway. We stopped into Rainbow to buy our new latest favorite food item…Amande (cultured almondmilk yogurt). and then, convinced that I must have new, warm running clothes (by my father of course) we took off down Lakeland where we sat in traffic for at least 30 minutes. All you people who live down Lakeland, I don’t know how you do it. Not only is it the heaviest traffic area in Jackson, it’s also full of the most idiotic drivers around. But I digress.

 We stopped to eat at Osaka because I’m trying to eat Paleolithic this week and sushi is most definitely on my diet. We then made it to our destination—Target. I am now the proud owner of new under-shirts and more pants that look like yoga pants but my dad is convinced they are for running. Either way, they will be warm and now I can continue my early morning runs. In the 23 degree weather.

 As we were in the checkout line (around 7:30pm) I heard my mom say, “oh gosh, we’ve got to get back to Meridian, your dad has to get up at 4:30am to work the ER in Neshoba”.

It was at that moment my heart melted. I had no idea my dad had to get up at 4:30am to drive an hour to then work a 12 hours shift….in the Emergency Room.

My dad is 61 years old. He still works about 60 hours a week. He maintains a very busy private practice and he still works the ER at least once a week and probably 2 weekends a month.

He doesn’t have to work this much.

He does it to take care of his four, now GROWN, children.

My dad would have never told me that he had to work because I’ve never heard him complain once in his life. I’ve never heard him complain when my mom spends his money.  I’ve never heard him complain that his grown children are still virtually completely dependent on him (except my brother, Brian, who is now a big-dog in the corporate world).

My dad drives a 1989 Toyota Previa with no air-conditiong, no radio and probably no heat. But we all have nice cars. (Well, mine’s not so nice now but at one time it was).

My dad works so that his family has all they need and more often, all they want. He always puts himself, his needs, and desires last.

When I start making money, the first thing I’m going to do is take my parents on a long trip.

I hope that in turn, I will be able to take as good of care of my parents as they age, as they have of me my entire life.

I’ve always said that I won’t change my last name if I should ever marry because no man on earth could ever compare to my dad.

I guess I’m writing this because I was thinking about how much help I need in life. With everything. Just to make it through the day requires a ton of help from family, friends, classmates, teachers, etc. There isn’t anything I do that is solely an effort of just me and me only. It’s all a combined effort from everyone in my life.

We joke that my nephew (my parent’s first grandchild) is our “community baby”.  My sister, his mother, is an excellent mom and would be quite capable of raising him herself, but because he lives at my parents house and is the FIRST for everybody (first nephew, grandchild, baby, etc) we all act as his care-takes. We are quite obsessed with that little boy (as if you couldn’t already tell). We call him our “community baby” because  not only do we all help take care of him, we all LOVE taking care of him.

I think in that sense, the majority of us are community babies.

And if you’re not,

It’s not too late to become one.

Learning to let people help you; learning to ask for help, is about the greatest and best thing you can possibly do for your life.

On this last day in November, I am most thankful for you. For all of you who take care of me; who encourage me; who support me; who admonish me; who speak the truth to me; who pull me up when I fall down; who laugh with me; who cry with me; who love me.

as always,

your community gal,

Jen

picture source here